chapfallen

Sometimes I wonder why is it like that. why is it that some people are gd, some of them are bad. Sometimes you wonder, why is it that people must make you life miserable, some must make things hard for you. is this really a dog eat dog world? Actually just touched your heart, did i ever say no to all your request? did i ever not do things b4 hand? I have always done things in advanced, if not to the best of my ability, you dont appreciate nevermind, but at least have the courtesy to do something nice in return. what's the point of accumulating them and not able to "redeem" them. its not like i asked for a lot, it's just once a month. Dont ask so many reason, if i am happy, i would be more than willing to do what you asked me to if its within my limits. i hope things will turn out better, i am just hoping, after all its just 10more months

Blast

random msgs and surprises is what i like. ha. maybe i just need some care and concern.

No matter how strong one appear on the outside, he has a weak side.

i hope that she will be fine, after all she's the only one've left with. (:

feeling elmo's fren

Melancholic

Its funny sometimes how directors get their ideas to film a movie, could it be from a personal experience or from just pure imagination. Sometime, people just wan to shift their responsibility, its so easy to say I dont know anything, you just shifted your responsibility. It's amazing how people can me nonchalant about things. claiming recognition where there only did a small part of it while others have been working their ass off. The person lying there is your mother. she not even died yet, and there you'll are fighting as though as its not already bad enough. Cant you just spare a bit of your frking heart to care for a old lady. It does not matter how many times you visit her, it can be only once but that one time you go there because you truly care and not because you go for the sake of it. FOR GOODNESS SAKE, cant you adults wake up! SERIOUSLY, HEAVEN is always watching over you,they know what you are up to and who you really ar.

It's disheartening to see the sight. Tears just welled. JUST MAKE SURE SHE IS FINE AND THAT'S ALL I ASK.

WE THE KINGS

Do you remember the nights
We'd stay up just laughing
Smiling for hours
At anything
Remember the nights
We drove around crazy in love

When the lights go out
We'll be safe and sound
We'll take control of the world
Like it's all we have to hold on to
And we'll be a dream

Do you remember the nights
We made our way dreaming
Hoping of being
Someone big
We were so young then
We were too crazy
In love

When the lights go out
We'll be safe and sound
We'll take control of the world
Like it's all we have to hold on to
And we'll be a dream

Whoa whoa
Whoa whoa
Whoa whoa


When the lights go out
We'll be safe and sound
We'll take control of the world
Like it's all we have to hold on to
And we'll be


When the lights go out
We'll be safe and sound We'll take control of the world
Like it's all we have to hold on to
And we'll be a dream

We all have a dream, you always thought that once it is fulfil you will be happy, but then again you have another dream, you just keep dreaming more and more till you forget that you cant fulfil your dream by dreaming it. Some parents are classic examples, ie to say, if their dreams cannot be fulfil, they pass it on to their children and put it nicely as their dreams. but have you ever thought that your child(ren) may not actually want to be this nor that?

No matter how afraid or how sad you are, you got to be strong and show your (: side

YOU WILL NEVER WALK ALONE

When you walk through a storm,
Hold your head up high,
And don't be afraid of the dark.
At the end of a storm,
There's a golden sky,
And the sweet silver song of a lark.
Walk on through the wind, Walk on through the rain,
Though your dreams be tossed and blown..

Walk on, walk on, with hope in your heart,
And you'll never walk alone.......
You'll never walk alone.

Walk on, walk on, with hope in your heart,
And you'll never walk alone.......
You'll never walk alone.

NOW I WALK ALONE, WHO WILL BE THERE TO JOIN ME?

need you now

Need You Now Lyrics

Picture perfect memories scattered all around the floor
Reachin for the phone cause I can't fight it anymore
And I wonder if I ever cross your mind
For me it happens all the time

It's a quarter after one, I'm all alone and I need you now
Said I wouldn't call but I lost all control and I need you now
And I don't know how I can do without
I just need you now

Another shot of whiskey can't stop looking at the door
Wishing you'd come sweeping in the way you did before
And I wonder if I ever cross your mind
For me it happens all the time

It's a quarter after one, I'm a little drunk and I need you now
Said I wouldn't call but I lost all control and I need you now
And I don't know how I can do without
I just need you now

Yes I'd rather hurt than feel nothin at all

It's a quarter after one I'm all alone and I need you now

And I said I wouldn't call but I'm a little drunk and I need you now

And I don't know how I can do without

I just need you now

I just need you now

Ooo, baby, I need you now

have you ever wished that someone will be there for you all the time, maybe not all the time, but when you need him/her, without a second word they will be here. i am lucky to have some of them but sometimes they are too caught up with their tight schedule. its non duty months for 6 weeks, can enjoy long holiday((: ord lo. LOL. sometimes having a girlfren is good as if all else fall you know that there will always be someone there for you,but that doesnt mean you neglect your friends, after all friends are always the people that will stay with you the longest least that girlfriend of yours becomes your wife. OH WELL. SO BORED!

NICE

TODAY WAS A FAIRYTALE, met up with reagen, chunfu, vanessa pin wen kailing fishy and wilson for alice in wonderland ( less pinwen) then headed for timbre, however due the long queue we made our way to chijmes where we went to hog breathe. ((: sometimes the simplest thing is the most wonderful thing. (:

130310, time pass really fast, 5 years have already passed. we have moved on for the better, and memories will be there to last.(:

TIRED

Tired of being what you want me to be, tired of doing stuff that are not in my job scope. tired of ppl pissing me off. but the irony of it is i like to get praise of doing extraordinary things in ordinary ways. Sometimes it just helps if there is another person who really understands you and love you. no need to many just one will do. This 5 years have been a rather quiet year with no emotional ties, i enjoy being single but on the other hand i want to find someone too. its not a must, but a bonus. oh well all these can wait, but now what i really want is to ORD! yes! ORD and nothing else. Although i noe what i am doing is something great ie protecting the nation sky, but sometimes when i am off duty, it makes me wonder why am i wasting my time here. although it is better than studying but sense of enjoyment sometimes you get when you are studying is far from anything you get when you are in the force. people dont praise you for your hardwork, although some do. while others just try to smoke their way through so as not to get themselves into hot soup. whats the point of doing last min work when you can do it daily and makes everything done easier. oh well. thank god i didnt sign on. or should i say, its not my type of job.

Anyway, lets not talk about work. talk about relationships. with parents? sometimes you just wish that they can understand you a little more, but sometimes you just feel that you can never be as close to them as you are, with your friends. but you know that they are the ones who will always be there for you, forgiving you, not neglecting you like what some of your friends may do. ironic isnt it. Sometimes you just want to be left alone, doing absolutely nothing at all, but then you somehow hope that someone wil msg you out of the blue and ask how are you, you get al excited and thrilled. then again you get annoyed if the person you receive the msg from is not who you wan it to be, you get even more annoy. THE most annoying thing is that if you are on off, the office still calls you to ask for stuff. although that may show your importance but it also shows that they are over reliant on you. oh well. suck thumb.

i dunno, i just like how someone will pat my head and call me *sha gua* silly head. it just make you feel love. feeling of being sayang?

THE TOUGHER THE PERSON APPEAR ON THE OUTSIDE, IT ONLY PROVE TO SHOW THAT HE IS TRYING TO COVER HIS WEAKER SIDE.

WOW

YET back again from a long week. practically did duty for like friday, sunday, tuesday, thursday and this coming sunday. oh well. suck thumb. but doing duty also good means you focus on just doing duty. FYI i dont do guard duty, I do duty of protecting the nation's sky. WA. IMBA rite? haha. people always think i do guard. nvm. I went out to eat dinner with my parents after so long. guai siols. ((: hope everything will stay as it is.

PS

Sometimes you just hope that the thought in your mind would be read by ppl even without you telling them, its amazing how some ppl does it. you just cant seem to figure out how they do it. oh well. it is the silence that is deafening. Anyway, back home to catch a breather before another stretch of duty surface. start to feel numb about duty as you do it more often.

Last week was fun, going to melson house and dinner with bmt peeps. its amazing how ppl have not meet for months and when they are together, there is alwasy things to say, talk and laugh about. all those foolish, silly things that ppl did. LOL

Anyway i dont like the feeling of being PS. like who likes it anyway, but it is saddening when you promise and you break it. i am very happy-go- lucky actually. I will do if you asked nicely just dont pissed me off or accuse me of something i didnt do. This year fan tai shui, and mommy told me that i shall control my temper and not vent it out as i like if not it wont be a very nice year for me ahead, esp to superior. LOL. so qiao. how can i not believe? anwyay its march already for 2010, so fast you may thing, soon enough i am a one year solider waiting for ORD. HAHA. cant wait for it man. HOORRAY POPING to zoe house later. TA!

FRENS

Friends are very special people. There are a lot of people out there saying that they are BFF, BFFF! but do they really mean what they say? Hmm. True friends are those no matter what time, how long you have never meet. one call it all that it takes for them to help. A friend in need is a friend in deed. Sometimes you just wonder how someone can be so cruel yet not feeling guilty themselves. could it be because someone did similar things to them and they decide not to be that good samaritian anymore. or do they feel great to see people suffering? But i do believe no matter how bad a person is, there still present a compassionate heart in him. agree? suddenly dont feel like blogging anymore. TATA

LOLx

HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY ZOE! had celebration at zoe house yesterday. TOTAL FUNNIEST. LOL. due to my very special BFF coming out with out of the world topic. LOL. HIGHNESS. POP the question on when you think our friendship will last. HA. although its random, but will the 7 of us be separated? with melson going to leave for states to study. and the girls graduating? finding their half apple. could it still be the same? or at least still keep in touch? same goes to niggers. Friendship is like relationship it takes all the parties to put in their part and nt just some. well i already have one that is on the verge. lets not talk about emo stuff. and I quite like what zw said yesterday nt because its nice to hear(no doubt) but what he say really set me thinking and i think its really true. HE said that i am one who shines whenever there's a group around me. shines nt as in taking the limelight but in a good way like more happy. and i start to eel all emo when i am alone. LOLx really. that how i feel also. i have build a relationship with people around me. i like having companies although sometime i like to be left alone. but more often than not i usually prefer to be with people. one of the most happiest times is playing floorball. Many memories left in there, all the training and stuff. actually apart from making into the national squad is one of my dreams i have another which i think it can be fulfilled easily is people i love come down and support me in my match, be it family, loved ones, friends( only jonathan, kailing and reagen naughty) once. i hope there would be really someone( chunfu and gang, zq and gang, zoe, sy and van and gang and all my close frens) just watch me play. although you all may nt understand the whole game play but its the presence that matters, give me the courage and support. probably then i will further excel. LOL. but anyway i dont even know if i am going to continue to play in the uni. let see how things goes. think thats abt all. SEE YA. OH! OH! OH! OH!

bumpy ride

LIFE has recently became a roller coaster ride for me, it started low, slow, but sunddenly you feel like you are on cloud nine where everything around you was perfect, you feel happy and all, but the next moment when it starts to descend. you start to feel queasy, feel afraid, the highness was soon over and even worst you found that you are having motion sickness, one moment of highness, happiness resulted in the day ending like crap, you feel down, upset, frustrated when people around you start giving that nonchalant attitude where they don't care about their stuff. they just want to cruise their way through when you someone who is responsible enough starts to gain recognition and people entrust things to you and you find yourself having so much to do that it never seems to finish, yet you may be happy that people trust you and task things to you, on the other hand you see others doing nothing but just stay around looking handsome, you just cant help it but to grumble why is it that they can be slacking their ass off and you are practically doing everything. why must you care so much, lets just get everyone frk. but you know you cant and can do nothing but to suck thumb as you do not want to spoil this relationship as you still need to face them almost the whole entire life. they are not bad i must say but they should be show more initiative and help out. when you dont have anything to do, it doesnt mean that other people have nothing to do, help them, so things can be done faster, quicker and everyone can be happier. why be the best when the best have to do everything, why be the lousiest when you know you can be the best?

FUN

THANKS BFFs for today, it really caught me off guard. i really did nt suspect anything, it was a total surprise for me ((; yea! THANKS. i really appreciate a lot. ZOE' mom fried rice, Shi yun granny curry, sandwiches from zoe, minmin and sy. SPIDERMAN CAKE FROM Van! ((: NT FORGETING ZW ANDRE AND MELSON IN THE CONSPIRACY, and the WOW WET TIME! lol ((: xie xie

I PRACTICALLY SPEND MY BD AT HOME. ): I GUESSED EVERYONE IS BUSY AND I HAVE TO GO FOR WEDDING DINNER. SUCKS! HAIZ. HAVE YOU EVER WANDER IF YOU PUT FREN AS IMPT PPL> DO THEY DO THE SAME? YOU ARE ALWAYS THERE FOR THEM, BUT SOMETIMES THEY JUST CANT BE THERE FOR YOU. SO LIVE YOUR OWN LIFE!

BIRTHDAY

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MYSELF? HAHA. turning twenty this year. finally reach the 20 le. old le. start to be an adult? LOL boon or bane? i dunno. nth to blog now.

LOVE

Back from a much dreaded week. NTH much to talk abt. Life is getting boring. what would it be like next week, would it be the same. lets hope i wont be disappointed.

NEW YEAR

IT"S THE START OF THE NEW YEAR! ((:

5 years now have passed, but it just seem to like happened yesterday. I am glad you still kept some of the stuff. (:

IT TAKES TWO HANDS TO CLAP

IT has been how many donkey months (even years) since I last blog. I do not know why i feel like blogging today. Time flies and its gonna be a new year ahead, throughout this year, nothing much have happened to me i guess cause i am in the army for almost 24/5. But throughout this past months, you can see that people do change, although they may say that they didn't but it's often the people around them who can sense or feel their difference. Last night i was bombarded with something, something that really sets me thinking,the channel U show 'THE PROMISE'. A short film abt a girl who is intellectually disabled and she fall in love with this normal guy (whom the society deemed as normal) in the very place they are working. It's very hard to explain, it there is any possible means to watch it, go watch it. It may look like a typical love story but have anyone thought about the parents of the girl feel? You may think that I am stupid, who in the right mind would think of such think, This is completely normal as people do not think of such stuff until they are trapped in them. Ask yourself, would you care so much abt your diet if the doctor did not tell you that you will die if you dont. would you exercise if you found out that the shirt you bought last month could no longer fit you and that you will die of illness? would you appreciate what someone has done for you all this while but one day they are gone or one day you are the one actually doing it. Although they might have exception but all that stated normally reflect itself in desperate times. It applies to sometimes too. Bringing back the point about the parents and the girl, the analogy that i am trying to draw from here is that, sometimes you cannot think only from your pov, you need to spare a thought of others too, try putting yourself in others shoe. What if your children was like that, who you scold them morons? It's always in times of desperate that people start to panic, start to think, start to be more understanding and compassionate.

It is the same for relationships be it family, girl-boy, gd girl-gd boy. It takes two hands to clap, it cannot work one way. Dont always think people are not putting in the effort, ask yourself, how much effort have you put in? And also, you may have put in YOUR 100% of course it would be gd that others have also put in their 100%, BUT look, others may think that they have already put in their 100%, but to you it is nt the 100% that you assume, you aspect, you demand it to be. SEE. it boils down to you. yea you. you are the one who deem the 100%, if you lower your standards, expect less and if it goes more than it, would not you be happier? Of course, there's always the presence of exceptions. when that occurs, it is time to reflect.

When will one start treasuring their things, it will be went those things/ people are gone be it forever or just for a little while. Make it a habit to say thanks, or at least acknowledge what others have done for you. sometimes i wonder, why be the gd ppl, it is always the gd ppl that suffers, in movies it is always the bad people that last throughout the movie, the gd ppl dies in betw and only one which is the main lead of the gd ppl stay till the end. so why be gd, but think of it if you become bad, then you reciprocate, arent you being that bad person that you hate? Oh well, contradiction again. IRONY. PARADOXICAL.

I am not trying to say big words here, i am just trying to state my opinions, my stand, my side of the story. i am not very gd at writing, but i am rather vocal.
Sometimes i wonder, whenever people ask me for help or whatsoever, my first ans will always be an yes, sometimes no questions asked, although they might be exceptions.
But when it is the other way round, there are only a few i know (hope) i can reply on. Actually i am quite shy in nature, although it may be otherwise when you know me well enough. haha. Actually i dunno why i compose this today, some random thoughts?

It is through misunderstanding that there is common understanding.

Hatred

There are good and bad news, The good news is the days are limited, and it's almost ending. The bad news is i have to tolerate for another two weeks or so. what am i going to do. will i be able to pull through. this is so not me. i dun wan to wear a mask. i cant help but to feel down at times. HAI. GOD tell me what to do. Make me a way when there seems to be no way!